For a week or so some of the people I really enjoy reading and listening to entered into a conflict with one another. I spent time confused, and also contacted both parties. They are both busy people with busy online lives as well as having full time offline lives. Both have been strong in discernment ministries. I am not as confused, and have decided that there may possibly be error on the part of both individuals. I refuse to “take sides” but instead am observing and figuring out what is going on. I am not wise, and am not perfect. I am sinful, a worm, a needy sinful worm. I am just a regular mom and Christian out here. My time is precious to me, and spending time reading and listening to radio shows to benefit my education on biblical issues and discernment is getting mucked up with this thing. But that doesn’t matter, I can and should always look to Christ first, not to men and women. You see, whatever wrong that is happening I can commit, I can easily do myself. Even if there is not a sin involved, any thing I perceive or just imagine may be happening, I could do myself.
It is my understanding that the parties have been in contact with one another. It is also my understanding that there is not a resolution, it may mean one of the two is wrong, is disobedient to God in their actions. It’s not about being loving because attempting to pull a brother or sister in Christ away from error is a deep love. Speaking the truth is love. I pray that even if I do not ever figure out who is right or wrong, that God will be glorified. I will also hope that I do not sin in this situation any further than I already have in thought or deed.
It hurts to see people who were once on the same side line up against each other. I believe there is a good reason and God will allow the truth to prevail. Christ will prevail.
On another note, a friend of mine has discovered she has breast cancer. She’s young (33) and has 5 children. She spent two nights last week talking to me…both nights were all nighters for me. This doesn’t help me homeschool and get things done. I don’t want to neglect my family, and yet know I needed to be there for her on the days I was able to. She will find out more this week. If you read this please pray for her. She’s scared as her kids will likely end up in a public school though she has deep convictions she should homeschool. She also has been told she’s bipolar, and has been taking medication. She is repetative in this extreme situation, telling people the same thing over and over again. I spent over 4 hours one night listening to her repeat the same story over and over again…maybe 2-3 times an hour. She is not handling things in a way others can understand. It’s hard to know what to do for her. I pray, I listen, that is all I can do right now.